The Annekenstein Monster

For some reason, the Charlottetown Transit system is using a smaller bus (less seats) for its busiest run, Confederation Centre to Charlottetown Mall.  i don’t know why they made the move, but I don’t really like the newer (older?) smaller bus.
Anyway, last night, I got on the bus and immediately knew it was going to be unpleasant.  A child wailing, in a stroller.  I sit at the back of the bus and for the whole of the duration of the trip out to the mall, the child did not stop wailing.
Now, I am a person who can tolerate all kinds of children’s crying if it seems to have a valid reason and purpose.  Like if the child was obviously in some physical discomfort, I wouldn’t begrudge the shrieking.  This kid, though, seemed to be doing it to spite its mother.  I say “its” because I honestly don’t know if it was a boy or a girl.  At first, the quality of the tortured screaming seemed to indicate to me that the child was, in fact, in pain.  Soon, though, it became clear that the kid was in no pain and was only testing the mother.  Upon this realization, my hate for the kid was totally on.
For a while, I sympathized for the mother.  Poor, tortured mother unable to handle the emotional blackmail of the child.  Soon, though, that sympathy turned to anger.  Shame on you for not being able to handle the emotional blackmail of the child.  Then I started wondering about the kid.  It looked to be rather too big to be in a stroller.  Also the kid didn’t actually wail any discernible words.  Just grunts and shrieks.  That made me think maybe the kid was disabled in some way.  I began to feel bad for the kid if this was the case.  Soon, though, it became clear that the kid was not affected by any disability.  Just a selfish, shrieking kid.  With an ineffectual, infuriating mother.
The whole experience made me want to get home and hug my son, because I cannot recall him ever acting out in such a way in public.  When I got home, I didn’t hug him, though, since I pretty much put the whole ugly experience out of my head as soon as I got off the bus.

So, there’s a video out there showing Pauley Shore doing his routine in some deep south place.  A guy in a cowboy hat comes up on stage and punches him.  There are reports that the thing was staged.  After looking at the video, which I’m not linking to, I would agree that it was staged.
If it was staged, well, how sad and desperate.  If it wasn’t staged, how sad and desperate that Pauley Shore is still doing standup.

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Another one of those movie exam things that show up every so often on Sergio Leone and the Infield Fly Rule.

1. What was the last movie you saw, either in a theater or on DVD, and why?
   The last movie I saw was Marebito,a Japanese quasi-horror flick that I didn’t really enjoy. But I saw that on The Movie Network, which is neither a theatre or DVD. So, to answer the question, the last movie I saw, either in a theatre or on DVD, was in a theatre. It was Casino Royale. The why of it is pretty simple: New Bond movie, and new Bond Bond. Itdoesn’t ask if I enjoyed it, but I did, for the most part. Daniel Craigis a very good Bond.

2) Name the cinematographer whose work you most look forward to seeing, and an example of one of his/her finest achievements.
I am assuming this means a current cinematographer whose (new) work I
most look forward to seeing. I’m not really too much into anticipating
the latest from cinematographers, as they pretty much go by
unrecognized by me (but not unappreciated, as I enjoy
interesting/pretty cinematography in movies). However, that last
cinematographer that I remember taking note of was Conrad L. Hall for Road To Perdition.
I thought that was a beautifully shot film. Sadly, he died shortly
after finishing it, so I can’t look forward to new work from him.

    3) Joe Don Baker or Bo Svenson?
Joe Don Baker.

    4) Name a moment from a movie that made you gasp (in horror, surprise, revelation…)
The first one that always comes to mind is the grave scene from Carrie.

5) Your favorite movie about the movies.
Robert Altman’s The Player, I guess.

6) Your Favorite Fritz Lang movie.
I don’t believe I’ve ever seen a Fritz Lang movie. And if I did, it didn’t register as a Fritz Lang movie.

    7) Describe the first time you ever recognized yourself in a movie.
I cannot recall.Or, I have not yet been adequately represented in a movie.  In all honesty, I see a lot of me in Dexter, the character in the Showtime TVseries Dexter.

8) Carole Bouquet or Angela Molina?
Even after a trip to IMDB, both actresses remain mysteries to me.  I’ll have to go with Carole Bouquet, though, simply because I see where she was in For Your Eyes Only.

9) Name a movie that redeems the notion of nostalgia as something more than a bankable commodity.
Wow, that’s one ofthose questions where you have to read it, like, a bunch of times even to begin to figure out what it means.  Does this mean name a movie that conjures up nostalgic thoughts in you, but doesn’t seem to be selling you the nostalgia?  Name a movie which honestly evokes nostalgia, is that what it means?
Hmm?  Does it have to be nostalgia for a period in my past, or can it be nostalgia for a period I didn’t experience?  I’ll say Hope and Glory.

    10) Favorite appearance by an athlete in an acting role.
Does Arnold Schwarzenegger in Terminator 2 count?  If so, I’ll go with that.  If not, I’m drawing a blank.  I will not say OJ Simpson.
   
    11) Favorite Hal Ashby movie.
Harold and Maude

    12) Name the first double feature you’d program for opening night of your own revival theater.
The first feature would be Bonnie & Clyde, followed by Polyester.

    13) What’s the name of your revival theater?
The Popcorn Box  (even as I was typing it, I started to hate it.  Then I began to really likeit. Now, I’m of mixed emotions about it)

    14) Humphrey Bogart or Elliot Gould?
Elliot Gould

    15) Favorite Robert Stevenson movie.
The Love Bug

    16) Describe your favorite moment in a movie that is memorable because of its use of sound.
The animal sounds in Raging Bull when Jake LaMotta is boxing.

    17) Pink Flamingoes— yes or no?
Yes

    18) Your favorite movie soundtrack score.
It’s cliche, I suppose, but The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly

    19) Fay Wray or Naomi Watts?
Fay Wray, all the way.

    20) Is there a movie that would make you question the judgment and/or taste of a film critic, blogger or friend if you found out they were an advocate of it?
Of course.  Lots of movies.  Too many to mention here.  Anything starring Pauly Shore, for one.

    21) Pick a new category for the Oscars and its first deserving winner.
Best ComicPerformance.  Does it have to be from the last year?  If so, hmm, not alot of comedies jumping out at me.  Okay, so I can’t think of anydeserving winners from this year, yet (although I’m sure there havebeen good comedic performances), but I do think it deserves to be acategory.  Comedic acting needs to be given its props.

    22) Favorite Paul Verhoeven movie.
In the same way that I suppose I could be forced to pick a favourite bout of diarrhea, I’d have to pick Showgirls.
   
    23) What is it that you think movies do better than any other art form? Distort the realities of history.

    24) Peter Ustinov or Albert Finney?
Albert Finney

    25) Favorite movie studio logo, as it appears before a theatrical feature.
I do like the kid fishing off the D in Dreamworks

    26) Name the single most important book about the movies for you personally.
Not much into books about the movies.

    27) Name the movie that features the best twist ending. (Please note the use of any “spoilers” in your answer.)
Psycho.  Only because the twist ending comes so early in the movie.

    28) Favorite Francois Truffaut movie.
Am I bad for not knowing if I’ve ever seen a Truffaut movie?

    29) Olivia Hussey or Claire Danes?
Olivia Hussey, please.  By default.

    30) Your most memorable celebrity encounter.
I have not had a memorable celebrity encounter.

    31) When did you first realize that films were directed?
Probably Jaws, when I realized that somebody was responsible for causing me to be so on edge.

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Well, the NFL season is firmly into its “if Team A wins three of their last four while Team B gets arrested in Mexico for indecent exposure, and as long Team C doesn’t cannibalize itself in a plane crash in the Andes, Team D has a slight chance of securing a Wild Card Spot” period, and it’s time to check in with my little NFL Picks contest.
Never before have I sucked more in making my picks each week.  I am an abysmal 85-107, which is 44.3%.  I could, theoretically, do better by flipping a coin.

Here are the current standings, with 4 regular season and all the playoff weeks/games still to come:

Graham the Conqueror is on top with the only 50%+ score:  99-93 (51.6%)
Next is the always near the top reverseflash with 92-100 (47.9%)
spragger2002 & Jim Simmonds are tied for third with 90-102 (46.9%)
RFTT1985 started out strong this season, but fell down the standings to 89-103 (46.3%)
Yours Truly, annekenstein, is at the bottom of the barrel, with a paltry 85-107 (44.3%)

And it’s not just a couple of bad weeks which have done me in.  Every week, I’ve sucked in my picks.  Except, I think, two weeks ago when I got something like 9-6.

My Dolphins have had a remarkably frustrating season, too, by the way.  A 1-6 start to the season doomed them to any realistic chance of making the playoffs.  They’re currently 5-7 and can only hope to play spoiler for others from here on out (even though they are not yet mathematically eliminated from playoff contention).

Here is a great gallery of some pics of kids with Santa.  Some of those Santa’s would make me cry too.

From DaveS comes this meme.  Sorry for using the word “meme”.  But it’s a good meme, I think.
 

Waking Up:
What My Woman Can’t Do (Can’t Be Done) – George Jones

First Day at School:
Squeeze Box – The Who

Fight Song:
Green Onions – Booker T. and the MG’s

Breaking Up:
Dancing Queen – Abba

Prom:
She’s Electric – Oasis

Life:
Snowin’ On Raton – Townes Van Zandt

Mental Breakdown:
I’m Looking Through You – The Wallflowers (cover of The Beatles)

Driving:
Beat Surrender – The Jam

Flashback:
Boarded Up – XTC

Getting Back Together:
My Heart Cries For You – Ray Charles

Wedding:
Sex Drugs and Rock & Roll – Ian Dury and the Blockheads

Birth of Child:
Pink Cashmere – Prince

Final Battle:
It’s Gonna Take An Airplane – The Destroyer

Death Scene:
Rise Above – Black Flag

Funeral Song:
Dark Side of the World – Marvin Gaye

Closing Credits:
Everything In Its Right Place – Radiohead

For the record, I skipped ahead once.  Once, instead of a song, I got a podcast, so I didn’t allow that to count.
Otherwise, a pretty cool soundtrack, if you ask me.  All over the place.  I am particularly happy with the Opening and Closing Credits choices.  Also happy to have Black Flag playing for my death scene.  Wonder where that’ll be, and what the circumstances will be?

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The men’s bathroom on the 3rd floor has got to be one of the busiest bathrooms in Charlottetown.  There is practically a constant rotation of bowel and bladder bothered men in there.  Often it’s a no-vacancy situation that forces me to go down one floor to the men’s bathroom that doesn’t seem to see half the action of the 3rd floor’s.

There are two stalls and one urinal.  One of the stalls is extra-wide for the wheelchair-enabled.  By choice, I don’t use that stall.  Even though I think I have as much right to use that stall as a handicapped person, I don’t. 
But today, I needed to pee, and while the second stall was free (urinal was in use), I decided on a whim to enjoy my piss in the vast openness of that extra-wide stall.  No sooner did I unzip my pants when I hear a click-click-click in the room.  I instinctively knew it was someone with a disability.  As I hadn’t yet started to vacate my bladder, I decided I’d vacate the stall and give it to the handicapped person.  Zip up and exit the stall, and I see the guy has already taken up residence at the urinal.  It’s a blind guy, and his white cane provided the click-click.
Since he’s already relieving himself at the urinal, I decide to go back to the extra-wide stall and relieve myself.  Decision made, and I do my business.
Even though I, like I said, feel I have as much right to use that stall as handicapped people, I obviously feel guilty for doing so. So, yeah, it’s odd, I think, to feel like I’m cheating by using it.  I felt a bit of guilt for almost being caught for using it.
I’m glad it didn’t turn into something with this guy, too.  Not that he would’ve turned it into anything, but I’ve had one other embarrassing (for me) experience with him.  We were both in the elevator, making our way to the third floor.  We had one of those inconsequential elevator conversations, and as the door opened, and we exited, I said to him, as a way to end the conversation “See you later”.  To a blind guy.  I’m sure he gets it all the time, but it caught me off guard, enough for me to try and stop myself in mid-sentence.  That made it worse.  Sort of like “See you… Later”.  Don’t think it phased him in the least, but I felt stupid for saying it.

This, from Good Housekeeping, 1955.  Here’s hoping my wife reads this.

• Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready, on time for his return.  This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs.  Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal (especially his favourite dish) is part of the warm welcome needed.
• Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you’ll be refreshed when he arrives.  Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh-looking.  He has just been with a lot of work-weary people.
• Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him.  His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.
• Clear away the clutter.  Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives.
• Gather up schoolbooks, toys, paper etc and then run a dustcloth over hte tables.
• Over the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by.  Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too.  After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.
• Prepare the children.  Take a few minutes to wash the children’s hands and faces (if they are small), comb their hair and, if necessary, change their clothes.  They are little treasures and he would like to see them playing the part.  Minimise all noise.  At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer or vacuum.  Try to encourage the children to be quiet.
• Be happy with him.
• Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him.
• Listen to him.  You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time.  Let him talk first – remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.
• Make the evening his.  Never complain if he comes home late or goes out to dinner, or other places of entertainment without you.  Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure and his very real need to be at home and relax.
• Your goal: Try to make sure your home is a place of peace, order and tranquility where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit.
• Don’t greet him with complaints and problems.
• Don’t complain if he’s late home for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through that day.
• Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or have him lie down in the bedroom.  Have a coll or warm drink ready for him.
• Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes.  Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.
• Don’t ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness.  You have no right to question him
• A good wife always knows her place.

You know, if women would just abide by these simple rules, the world would be such a better place.

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Or… Donald Rumsfallen and he can’t get up.

I didn’t even know he was sentenced to be sick.