A Professor Van Helsing Movie Quiz Answered

My pal, DaveS, pointed me towards this interesting movie quiz.  If you like movies, and feel so compelled, how about filling out your responses to the questions (I’ll post them in order at the end of this post so you can copy and paste, if you want) and putting them in the comments section here?
You don’t have to, but you might enjoy it.  I found I got more enjoyment in coming up with my responses than I thought I would.

It can be found here:

PROFESSOR VAN HELSING’S JUST-BEFORE-SUNRISE
WOODEN-STAKE-THROUGH-SPRING-BREAK QUIZ

     1) What film made you angry,
either while watching it or in thinking about it afterward?

One film that made me angry as
I watched it was Waiting…  I could only
take a couple of minutes of that shit.   Another teeth-clencher was Master of
Disguise
.  I couldn’t leave, because my
son was enjoying it.  Ugh.

A film that I tolerated as I
watched it was Crash, but then really, really grew to dislike it afterwards, as
I thought more about it, and as I saw the praise that was heaped on it.

2) Favorite sidekick

While I don’t think of them as
films, because I’ve only seen them on TV, Warner Bros. shorts are, I believe, acceptable
fodder for this quiz.  Therefore, I’d
say, without question, my favourite sidekick is Daffy Duck.  Although, I suspect he’d take issue with
being labeled as such.

3) One of your favorite movie lines

It was kind of a bachelor party
weekend for me, and I was in Halifax
with a couple of buddies.  We went to an
evening screening of The Untouchables. 
At the end of the movie, the reporter character asks Elliot Ness
(paraphrasing): “They say they may repeal the prohibition laws, Mr. Ness.  What will you do?”  Ness says “I
think I’ll have a drink.”  At the end of
a great movie, and with the prospect of an evening of drinking ahead of us,
that line really struck a chord with me, and was a great kick-start to the
night.

Other than that, there are at
least two-dozen lines from Raising Arizona
that I could easily list as among my favourites.

4) William Holden or Burt Lancaster?

I’d have to go with Holden,
only because I’m not familiar with much of Lancaster’s stuff.  And my memories of Burt focus more on his
more recent “old man” roles, which isn’t fair.  The few roles I’ve seen Holden in, I thought
he was good.  

 5) Describe a perfect moment in
a movie

I hate to cite a moment from a
movie I was involved in making, but I really think I have to:

The movie is Florid, about four
street people, in the dead of winter on PEI,
trying to raise enough funds to move to Florida
so they can bum there.  At one point, Ed
Rashed’s character is standing, in the cold, in front of the Arts Guild,
bumming money.  Laurie Murphy walks by,
but is stopped by Ed’s question:  “Spare
some change for a coffee?”  Laurie looks
at him in a somewhat disapproving manner. 
She knows what he’d do with any money she gave him.  So, she says, in perfect condescension, “No,
but if you come with me, I’ll buy you a cup of coffee.”  Ed gives her a bitter, bitter look and says
“Fuck off!” as he turns away from her. 
Laurie, shaking her head, simply walks off.


6) Favorite John Ford movie

Of the few John Ford movies
I’ve seen, I’d say The Quiet Man would be my favourite.


7) The inverse of a question from the last quiz: What film artist (director,
actor, screenwriter, whatever) has the least–deserved good reputation,
artistically speaking. And who would you replace him/her with on that pedestal?

I’m not a fan of the acting of
two actors:  Julia Roberts and Rene
Zellwegger.   I think they get way more praise and credit than they deserve.  And I’m not going to
replace them with anyone, because I don’t like putting anyone on a pedestal.

 8) Barbara Stanwyck or Ida
Lupino?

I’m not really familiar with
Ida Lupino.  I know she was a some-time
actor and some-time director, so that’s cool. 
But it’s hard to go against Barbara Stanwyck, solely for her role in
Double Indemnity.


9) Showgirls
yes or no?

I’ll say it this way:  Yes, to the question of did I enjoy watching
it once.  No to the question of do I ever
want to see it again.


10) Most exotic or otherwise unusual place in which you ever saw a movie

Not very exotic or otherwise
unusual, but I’d have to go with a little theater on the main street in Rockport, Maine.  I believe we saw Roxanne?


11) Favorite
Robert
Altman
movie

I like M*A*S*H* quite a bit, but I think I’m going to say Short Cuts.  It had Tom Waits, too.

12) Best argument for allowing rock stars to participate in the making of
movies

I’m going to go in a different
direction on this one, and say that Colonel Tom’s pushing Elvis Presley into
movies probably did more good in curbing future rock stars from following that
route than it did bad in ruining Elvis’s music integrity.  Perhaps it served as a cautionary tale to
others to stick to what they do best. 
Let the actors act and the singers sing. 
It’s kind of like letting one kid touch a hot flame so that the rest of
the kindergarten class can learn the lesson too.

So, the best argument for
allowing rock stars to participate in the making of movies ends up being the
one that hopefully makes them think twice before contemplating their
participation in the making of movies.


13) Describe a transcendent moment in a film (a moment when you realized a film
that just seemed routine or merely interesting before had become something much
more)

It happens really early in the
film, and not only was it a transcendent moment of that film, but, for me, it
was a transcendent moment of Film.   The
little space ship zooms fast across the top of the screen, being chased by
weapon-fire.  What’s chasing it, you
wonder, as it disappears into the distance. 
Then, that huge, lumbering immensity of a ship appears at the top of the
screen, following the little ship, firing shots.  And it lumbers along, and grows bigger.  And lumbers along and grows bigger still.  And it doesn’t stop.  And it’s huge.  And then, finally, after what seems like an
eternity, the end of the ship is revealed, and the engines rumble and
boom.  That moment, for me, said so much
about what we, the audience in that theatre, were about to witness that
evening.


14) Gina Gershon or Jennifer Tilly?

I am not a fan of Gina Gershon,
really, and am fond of Jennifer Tilly’s performance in Bullets Over
Broadway
.  So, Jennifer Tilly.


15) Favorite Frank Capra movie

It’s boring, I know, to say so,
but It’s A Wonderful Life.  So many
iconic moments for me.  So many moments
when I know I’m going to tear up.


16) The scene you most wish you could have witnessed being filmed

I haven’t given this much
thought, and there are likely others, if I put my mind to it.  Truthfully, I’d be wary to view the making of many of my favourite scenes, for fear of having their “magic” lost by seeing the process.  But this scene, I think, would be fabulous to
witness:  the “rushing the bridge” scene
in The Longest Day.  It’s a wonderful
long single-shot scene involving dozens and dozens of soldiers, all kinds of
choreography, and a real sense of “okay, let’s get this right, because we only
have one shot at this”.  I’d want to be
standing about 10 feet away from the director, and watch the whole thing
unfold.

17) Robert Ryan or Richard Widmark?

Never heard of Robert Ryan, and
only vaguely familiar with Widmark.  So,
I’m just going to go with Richard Widmark, even without looking them up on
IMDB.

18) Name a movie that inspired you to walk out before it was finished

To my recollection, I’ve only
walked out of one movie:  Amos &
Andrew
.  I, along with the group I was
with, walked out in the first ten minutes or so.  To be fair to the movie, it wasn’t given a
chance by the group I was with.  But it
didn’t start very well, and combined with the absolute dumbest pre-show
audience, we were all more than ready to leave. 
We got our money back and cursed the idiots who go to movies.

19) Favorite political movie

All The President’s Men.  In second place, some distance back, would be
the original The Manchurian Candidate.


20) Your favorite movie poster/one-sheet, or the one you’d most like to own

Never really been a poster
geek, but I’d like to have either the poster for Jaws, or The Good, The Bad,
and The Ugly
.

21) Jeff Bridges or Jeff Goldblum?

Bridges, because I think he
more often serves the movies he’s in. Goldblum is always, always interesting to
watch, but sometimes his acting gets in the way of, well, his acting.


22) Favorite Ken Russell movie

Honestly, I’ve only seen a
handful of his movies, but of the ones I’ve seen, the one I most enjoyed was
The Lair of the White Worm.


23) Accepting the conventional wisdom that 1970-1975 marked a golden age of
American filmmaking in which artistic ambition and popular acceptance were not
mutually exclusive, what for you was this golden age’s high point? (Could be a movie, a trend, the
emergence of a star, whatever)

The 1974 Academy Awards Best
Pictures nominations:  The Godfather part
II, Chinatown, The Conversation, Lenny, The Towering Inferno

24) Grace Kelly or Ava Gardner?

Grace Kelly


25) With total disregard for whether it would ever actually be considered, even
in this age of movie recycling, what film exists that you feel might actually
warrant a sequel, or would produce a sequel you’d actually be interested in
seeing?

Totally disregarding the fact
that they’ve already been made, and that they’re prequels, not sequels, I’d
love to see Star Wars episodes 1, 2 & 3 remade with much more attention to
the script and to the quality of the acting. 
I’d love to have George Lucas totally give them over to some writers and
directors, and only provide whatever Industrial Light and Magic was asked of
him.  I would love to see those movies
made.

Here are the questions, if you want to have them for your own:

1)What film made you angry, either while watching it or in thinking
about it afterward?
2) Favorite sidekick
3) One of your favorite movie lines
4) William Holden or Burt Lancaster?

5) Describe a perfect moment in a movie

6) Favorite John Ford movie.
7) The inverse of a question from the last quiz: What
film artist (director, actor, screenwriter, whatever) has the least–deserved
good reputation, artistically speaking. And who would you replace him/her with
on that pedestal?

8) Barbara Stanwyck or Ida Lupino?
9) Showgirls— yes or no?
10) Most exotic or otherwise unusual place in which you ever saw a movie
11) Favorite
Robert
Altman
movie
12) Best argument for allowing rock stars to participate in the making of
movies
13) Describe a transcendent moment in a film (a moment when you realized a film
that just seemed routine or merely interesting before had become become
something much more)
14) Gina Gershon or Jennifer Tilly?
15) Favorite Frank Capra movie
16) The scene you most wish you could have witnessed being filmed
17) Robert Ryan or Richard Widmark?
18) Name a movie that inspired you to walk out before it was finished
19) Favorite political movie
20) Your favorite movie poster/one-sheet, or the one you’d most like to own
21) Jeff Bridges or Jeff Goldblum?
22) Favorite Ken Russell movie
23) Accepting the conventional wisdom that 1970-1975 marked a golden age of
American filmmaking in which artistic ambition and popular acceptance were not
mutually exclusive, what for you was this golden age’s high point? (Could be a
movie, a trend, the emergence of a star, whatever)
24) Grace Kelly or Ava Gardner?
25) With total disregard for whether it would ever actually be considered, even
in this age of movie recycling, what film exists that you feel might actually
warrant a sequel, or would produce a sequel you’d actually be interested in
seeing?

3 Comments

  1. 1)What film made you angry, either while watching it or in thinking about it afterward?

    THELMA & LOUISE.

    2) Favorite sidekick

    WILLIAM FORSYTHE (RAISING ARIZONA).

    3) One of your favorite movie lines

    “YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL” (THE EXORCIST).

    4) William Holden or Burt Lancaster?

    HOLDEN, MOSTLY BECAUSE HE WAS IN “SUNSET BLVD”, “NETWORK”, AND… “THE TOWERING INFERNO”. I LIKE LANCASTER TOO THOUGH…

    5) Describe a perfect moment in a movie

    THE OPENING OF HITCHCOCK’S “REAR WINDOW” (MY FAV FLICK), WHEN WE LEARN EVRYTHING WE NEED TO KNOW ABOUT JIMMY STEWART’S CHARACTER WITHOUT A SINGLE WORD OF DIALOGUE, JUST A CAMERA MOVING AROUND HIS APARTMENT, TELLING US WHAT IT WANTS US TO KNOW.

    6) Favorite John Ford movie.

    “THE SEARCHERS”.

    7) The inverse of a question from the last quiz: What film artist (director, actor, screenwriter, whatever) has the least–deserved good reputation, artistically speaking. And who would you replace him/her with on that pedestal?

    KICK PAUL HAGGIS (SCREENWRITER OF “MILLION DOLLAR BABY” AND WRITER/DIRECTOR OF “CRASH”) OFF, AND GIVE GEORGE ROMERO A HAND UP ONTO THAT THERE PEDESTAL.

    8) Barbara Stanwyck or Ida Lupino?

    “DOUBLE INDEMNITY” IS FANTASTIC, BUT I’M PICKING LUPINO, BECAUSE SHE FOUGHT GIANT WORMS IN “FOOD OF THE GODS”, AND SHE WROTE AND DIRECTED INTERESTING TV SHOWS AND MOVIES.

    9) Showgirls– yes or no?

    MOST DEFINITELY YES, YES, UNGH-OHHH, YES…

    10) Most exotic or otherwise unusual place in which you ever saw a movie

    SMOKEY BAR IN KATHMANDU, NEPAL WATCHING A BOOTLEG DVD OF “KNOCKAROUND GUYS”.

    11) Favorite Robert Altman movie

    “SHORT CUTS”

    12) Best argument for allowing rock stars to participate in the making of movies

    ‘CUZ ACTORS LOOK PHONEY TRYING TO PLAY MUSICIANS IN MOVIES.

    13) Describe a transcendent moment in a film (a moment when you realized a film that just seemed routine or merely interesting before had become become something much more)

    “I AM A FUGITIVE FROM A CHAIN GANG” WHEN PAUL MUNI GETS ARRESTED FOR NOT PAYING FOR HIS HAMBURGER.

    14) Gina Gershon or Jennifer Tilly?

    GEEZ, I LIKE ‘EM BOTH, BUT I’LL SAY TILLY, ‘CUZ SHE’S MADE MORE INTERESTING (TO ME) FLICKS THAN GERSHON.

    15) Favorite Frank Capra movie

    “MR SMITH GOES TO WASHINGTON”.

    16) The scene you most wish you could have witnessed being filmed

    THE CHA-CHA HEELS SCENE IN JOHN WATERS’ “FEMALE TROUBLE”.

    17) Robert Ryan or Richard Widmark?

    WIDMARK, ‘CUZ HE WAS FREAKY.

    18) Name a movie that inspired you to walk out before it was finished

    “AMOS AND ANDY”, THE LIVE ACTION VERSION OF “101 DALMATIONS”, AND, HEY ROB, YOU ALSO WALKED OUT OF THIS ONE, “REALITY BITES”.

    19) Favorite political movie

    EXCLUDING WAR MOVIES THAT HAVE A POLITICAL BENT, THE ORIGINAL “MANCHURIAN CANDIDATE”.

    20) Your favorite movie poster/one-sheet, or the one you’d most like to own

    “JAWS”.

    21) Jeff Bridges or Jeff Goldblum?

    BRIDGES.

    22) Favorite Ken Russell movie

    “THE DEVILS”, THOUGH I LOVE “CRIMES OF PASSION”, “LAIR OF THE WHITE WORM”, AND “ALTERED STATES”.

    23) Accepting the conventional wisdom that 1970-1975 marked a golden age of American filmmaking in which artistic ambition and popular acceptance were not mutually exclusive, what for you was this golden age’s high point? (Could be a movie, a trend, the emergence of a star, whatever)

    THE GROUP OF FILMMAKERS THAT EMERGED SEEMINGLY ALL AT ONCE: COPPOLA, SCORSESE, FRIEDKIN, BOGDANOVICH, DE PALMA, ETC.

    24) Grace Kelly or Ava Gardner?

    BOTH GREAT, BUT KELLY, DUE TO HER WORK WITH HITCHCOCK .

    25) With total disregard for whether it would ever actually be considered, even in this age of movie recycling, what film exists that you feel might actually warrant a sequel, or would produce a sequel you’d actually be interested in seeing?

    “TO LIVE AND DIE IN L.A.”.

    Like

  2. 1) What film made you angry, either while watching it or in thinking about it afterward?

    Bram Stoker’s Dracula. Had just finished reading Bram Stoker’s Dracula for the first time. Great book the film was an atrocity. KEANU REEVES!!! Nice accent, ugh.

    2) Favorite sidekick

    Elwood P. Dowd, Harvey as played by Jimmy Stewart

    3) One of your favorite movie lines

    From the Coen Brother’s Masterpiece Miller’s Crossing

    Verna: Shouldn’t you be doing your job?
    Tom Reagan: Intimidating helpless women is my job.
    Verna: Then go find one, and intimidate her.

    4) William Holden or Burt Lancaster?

    Burt Lancaster

    5) Describe a perfect moment in a movie

    Andy Dufresne on top of the building after the guys had their beers just quietly looking at the sky.

    6) Favorite John Ford movie

    The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance

    7) The inverse of a question from the last quiz: What film artist (director, actor, screenwriter, whatever) has the least–deserved good reputation, artistically speaking. And who would you replace him/her with on that pedestal?

    M. Night Shyamalan is crap. Brian Singer. Usual Suspects is still favourite of mine and he did a very good job of hollywood blockbuster style X-Men 1 and 2 and Superman looks like it will be great.

    8) Barbara Stanwyck or Ida Lupino?

    Barbara Stanwyck she had me at Double Indemnity

    9) Showgirls– yes or no?

    no i guess never have seen this one. If I wanted to watch porn I’d just watch porn.

    10) Most exotic or otherwise unusual place in which you ever saw a movie

    I guess the Chinese theatre in Vancouver I frequented with it’s sweet candied popcorn.

    11) Favorite Robert Altman movie

    Brewster McCloud just beats out MASH

    12) Best argument for allowing rock stars to participate in the making of movies

    Sting in Dune. Perfect for the role although I disliked the movies interpretation of Herberts world.

    13) Describe a transcendent moment in a film (a moment when you realized a film that just seemed routine or merely interesting before had become become something much more)

    Usual Suspects. The revelation scene as Kevin Spacey walks out of the Police Department and it all comes together.

    14) Gina Gershon or Jennifer Tilly?

    Jennifer Tilly

    15) Favorite Frank Capra movie

    Mr. Smith Goes to Washington.

    16) The scene you most wish you could have witnessed being filmed

    The Scarlett Empress where Marlene Dietrich leads the cavalry charge. Just to see Josef von Sternberg’s lightning for the movie would be amazing.

    17) Robert Ryan or Richard Widmark?

    Richard Widmark

    18) Name a movie that inspired you to walk out before it was finished

    My Blue Heaven starring Steve Martin and Rick Moranis. Mainly I walked out because the power went out in the theatre giving me and my friends time to decide that any movie we rented would be better than this.

    19) Favorite political movie

    Bob Roberts. A frightnening look to the future of the Republican party.

    20) Your favorite movie poster/one-sheet, or the one you’d most like to own

    The Revenge of the Jedi one that was recalled when they changed the name of the film. Or the Spider-Man poster with the WTC reflected in his eye. Mostly because I could sell them on ebay for a lot.

    21) Jeff Bridges or Jeff Goldblum?

    tough one but the Dude from The Big Lebowski just barely beats out New Jersey from Buckaroo Banzai

    22) Favorite Ken Russell movie

    Lair of the White Worm

    23) Accepting the conventional wisdom that 1970-1975 marked a golden age of American filmmaking in which artistic ambition and popular acceptance were not mutually exclusive, what for you was this golden age’s high point? (Could be a movie, a trend, the emergence of a star, whatever)

    Francis Ford Coppala forms his own studio which launches his multi oscar career and that of George Lucas.

    24) Grace Kelly or Ava Gardner?

    Not only is she a princess but she was in Rear Window, Kelly all the way.

    25) With total disregard for whether it would ever actually be considered, even in this age of movie recycling, what film exists that you feel might actually warrant a sequel, or would produce a sequel you’d actually be interested in seeing?

    Mystery Men 2 : This Flame, This Carrott. A sequel that would unite the Mystery Men with the A list hero The Flaming Carrot.

    Like

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