Everyone Into The Oscar Pool!!

Alright, okay.
This is the final reminder to join in The Annekenstein Monster Oscar Pool.

Click that link above, answer the questions and submit.  If you win, you could win great prizes, like:

An announcement on this site that you won!
A moment of consideration of your existence by the dozen or so people who might read your name in that announcement!!!
And, I’ve just decided, the winner will win (if it doesn’t end up being more of a pain than it’s worth) two complimentary tickets to the very next Sketch22 performance (currently scheduled for this summer).

25% Funny, 40% Shocking, 35% Bad

About a month ago, I was, inexplicably, asked via email if I’d like to review Comedy Central’s Roast of Pamela Anderson – Uncensored.  Apparently because of what I write on this blog, I “seem like a reputable influencer”.  I guess one of my posts which mentioned Sarah Silverman (who appears on the roast), was the bridge between my blog and the company M80, which, according to their website, “is a unique Entertainment and Lifestyle Marketing company specializing in online grassroots marketing, online publicity and promotion, creative services, lifestyle and offline marketing, fanclub service, market research and consulting.”
Intrigued by the process and by the absurdity of the whole ‘reputable influencer’ concept, I agreed, and a couple of weeks later, I received the DVD in the mail.  I watched it yesterday and today.
Here’s what I think:
I used to be a fan of the Dean Martin roasts, years ago, that would occasionally air on television.  I enjoyed the idea of celebrities and barely-celebrities coming together to insult the roastee.  I always thought they were rather tame, though, and quite likely heavily censored.  That, of course, was par for the era.  My curiousity was further piqued a couple of years ago when I had heard about the existance of Friars Roasts.  Apparently, these were anything but tame, and I’d read all kinds of articles and reviews of No-Holds-Barred insults and bad language and filth and foul, etc.  I’d always wanted to see one of these roasts.  Not because I wanted to be entertained by filth and foul (although I have nothing against it), but moreso, because I was curious to see if my limits and sense of “crossing the line” were on par with those of so-called professional comedians and entertainers.
So, that was kind of my history and experience with roasts, before I put this DVD into the player.
And how was the Pamela Anderson Roast – Uncensored? 
I knew of most of the comedians who roasted Pamela – Jimmy Kimmel (host), Adam Carolla, Sarah Silverman, Andy Dick, Eddie Griffin – and didn’t know others – Jeffrey Ross, Nick DiPaolo, Greg Giraldo, Lisa Lampanelli, Lady Bunny (a female impersonator.  Actually, a Divine impersonator, if you ask me). Some of the guests weren’t comedians, but acquainted with Pamela Anderson – Tommy Lee and Courtney Love-Cobain, and for some strange reason, Bea Arthur was on hand too.
Rather than go through each performer’s performance, I’ll just say that, like the title of the post says, I’d guess that 25 percent of the jokes were funny, 40% shocking and 35% simply bad..  Some jokes made me laugh out loud, but there weren’t enough really funny jokes to make me glad I watched it.  Of the 40% shocking, some of it was very vulgar, and a lot of it was pretty personal.  Honestly, I was rather fascinated with these personal, shocking, vulgar jokes, and while many of them weren’t really funny, and a lot of them covered the same ground – Tommy Lee has a huge penis, Pamela has a large vagina and is a “loose” woman – I was interested to see how far, how personal, the comics would go.  Of course, a lot of the material fell completely flat and was rather painful to watch.  But even that was somewhat interesting to me, because it seemed that a lot of this material was written specifically for this event, for Pamela.  So it was interesting to see comedians trying out what I assume to be new material.  Some of the comics are naturally funny and made jokes work despite themselves, and some of the jokes didn’t work because you could tell the comics didn’t have the timing quite right yet.  So, that was interesting to me.  Not funny, for the most part.  But interesting.
Part of the tradition of roasts, I believe, is to also make fun of the other guests.  So, through this tradition, I now know that Jimmy Kimmel has a small penis and large balls.  Andy Dick is gay and Bea Arthur may be a man.  Again, some of this was funny, some was interestingly shocking and personal, and a lot of it was just boring.  It was usually interesting to see how the various people reacted to insults that you just know had to hit a personal nerve with them.
Specific things to mention:
Courtney Love-Cobain is a mess.  And not a funny mess.   There’s not a lot of humour to anything Courtney Love-Cobain does.
Andy Dick’s bit wasn’t very funny.  He pretended to be Pamela’s plastic surgeon, and the bit didn’t work very well.  I’m usually a fan of the characters and bits he does for things like the MTV awards, but you could tell not much effort went into this bit.
Tommy Lee performed a song, which I fast-forwarded through, because, well, why would I watch it?  He also had a monologue that was painfully unfunny and boring.
Sarah Silverman was funny, but not as funny as I had hoped she’d be.
Bea Arthur was pretty funny, surprisingly.  All she really did was read excerpts from one of Pamela’s novels (she’s written two, apparently).  So, it was funny seeing Bea Arthur, with what’s left of her dignity (there were a lot of pretty mean jokes recited about her throughout the night), reading these rather soft-porn soft-literature passages.

If you enjoy base humour and a lot of it, you may like this more than I did.  As I said, I laughed out loud a few times, but mostly I was intrigued by the oddity of it, and interested in it from a professional standpoint. It’s a wonder, the depths of degradation that celebrities are willing to go, both roasters and roastee..

The DVD extras were terrible.  Some “rehearsal” footage of Courtney and Andy talking.  Far too much “red carpet” interviewing and banter that was pretty excruciating to sit through.  And a few snippets from other Comedy Central productions.

The funniest thing on the whole DVD, which happened to be the very last thing I watched, and which happened to symbolise, to an extent, my experience with the DVD, was a clip from South Park.  Paris Hilton had just opened a new store in town, called Stupid Spoiled Whore.  As she’s leaving the town in her limo, with her little dog, she’s talking inanity on the phone, and being very preciously spoiled.  The dog, desperate to get away from the blackness that is Paris Hilton’s very being, steals the limo drivers pistol and attempts to commit suicide with it.  The dog tries a variety of positions and finally succeeds in blowing its brains out.

Now that’s comedy!

Disappearing Rhapsody

View this clip on Vimeo

Last summer, my son and his friend and I decided we’d experiment with making people appear and disappear on video. So, we did this, and added a bit of music to make it, like, you know, artsy.

Boom Goes The Dynamite, Part Three

My nephew, Johnny, has autism. He’s an incredibly good looking 5 year old boy, with a ton of energy and, once he gets to know you, a smile that lasts forever. Ever since he’s been born, I’ve had a soft-spot for stories that relate to the autistic. In fact, I’ve been interested in autism since university when I learned about it when I was an undeclared psychology major.

This story got me choked up when I first watched it. Then, when I called my wife in to watch it too, I welled up and cried tears. Something I don’t do very often. It’s one of those feel-good stories.
Check it out, why don’t you.

The Annekenstein Monster Oscar Pool Reminder

Since it’s getting closer, I thought I’d once again post the link for you to go to enter The Annekenstein Monster Oscar Pool.
It’s as simple as clicking on the radio buttons of the films you think are going to win each category.  And the joy you’ll receive in winning will be immense.  Hell, even the joy you receive in coming in last will be worth it.

So, click this link, and make your picks.  Click send and I’ll receive your list.  It won’t be as good as my list, but I’ll tally it anyway.

Here’s who’s entries I already have:

DaveS
Paella
Fraser
Kris
My Own
Elvira “I know popcultured sucks” Kurt
Tracy

Surely you can make better picks than these losers.  Give it a try.

Leave Your Ones At Home, Bird

Johnny Cash sings a child-friendly version of “Don’t Take Your Guns To Town” on Sesame Street. You know, taking out the guns and the killings and such. Because, well, it’s for kids.

RIFF 4 Shorts Review

I went last night to see both screenings of Reel Shorts at the Reel Island Film Festival.  That’s a lot of sitting in those City Cinema seats, I’ll tell ya!
Here, then, are my opinions on what I saw:
Pete Murphy’s “The Olde Christmas Spirit” was shown first.  Frankly, this was a rough piece of work.  Pete, I think, has an interesting eye, but this film (as well as the few other films of his I’ve seen) suffers from poor acting, worse sound and lazy editing.  The story and script, too, could have benefitted tremendously from a prudent editor.  
The acting in the first scene was, I’d have to describe as, plodding.  Very slow and deliberate.  Couple that with languid edits and the film starts off at a less than energetic pace.  And slows down from there.  The main trouble with the acting of the lead actor is that he tries too too hard to act Angst and tries to play “Cool guy” too much.  His acting gets in the way of his, well, acting.
I could go on, I suppose, but I have to live in this town.
Next up was “Snowbird” The Search for Lonestar” by Scott Parsons.  An interesting, but slightly flawed, docu-drama on the origins of Gene McLellan’s song Snowbird.  I say flawed because of too much reliance on voice-over narration to tell us what is going on.  It results in too much telling us the drama rather than showing us the drama.  The story is about this woman trying to find out about a guy named Lonestar, a former lover, who apparently co-wrote a song about her with Gene McLellan.  She’s trying to find out about the song.  Turns out the song is Snowbird.  Little things bugged me.  Like when we flashback to the woman’s younger days, when she’s with Lonestar, she’s wearing the same short denim shorts that she’s wearing in “present day”.  And there was no attempt to make her look younger in those flashback scenes.  Maybe that was a conscious decision, but to me it belied the reality of those scenes where she was supposed to be a teenager.  Especially since her “youthfulness” was supposed to be the thing that sets of the rest of the story.  Small complaints, really.
Third was Louise Lalonde’s “Courir la chandeleur”, a re-enactment of an old Acadien soiree, performed by Birchwood Intermediate French Immersion students.  This was an enjoyable film.  Yes, the acting of the junior high kids was pretty amateurish (and some of their French Immersion french was pretty rough), but their energy and enjoyment of the experience kept me interested.  Probably could have shortened the amount of time we see them dancing to a tune, though.  That seemed to go on a bit too long.
Speaking of going on a bit too long:  Jeremy Larter’s “A.J.” was a film that I absolutely hated and couldn’t wait for it to be over.  Basically, this was a masterbatory piece of shit, where one guy, Jeremy Larter, points his camera at another guy (forget his name) who plays A.J. who may or may not be mentally handicapped and gets him to do “funny” stuff.  What a piece of crap and a waste of my time!  Scene after scene of this guy doing stupid, barely interesting, things.   There was no apparent attempt at structure.  Just random scene after scene of boring “look at me and how car-aaazy! I am” bullshit.
Thank goodness for Joey Weale’s “Flagwar”.  Basically, this film documents an elaborate game of capture the flag on the streets of Charlottetown.  Very well done, it kept me interested and entertained for almost its entirety.  I say “almost” because my only criticism is that it may be a few minutes too long, and a couple of times I wanted the action to move along, rather than showing me, yet again different versions of basically the same scene or idea.  The film employed a lot of still-photos to further the action, and at first I was worried that such a technique might bog the film down.  Nobody likes a slideshow, right.  But, to his credit, Joey made it work beautifully.  He used all kinds of tricks and techniques (without making them feel simply like tricks or techniques) to keep the action moving forward and to keep the audience engrossed and it worked wonderfully.  It’s apparent that a great deal of thought and effort went into the production of film, and I was very much impressed with the whole thing.
Of the first round of Reel Shorts, Flagwar got my “viewer’s choice” vote.

The second round of Reel Shorts was basically a display of the talents of Fox Henderson.  Five of the nine shorts were either “all credits by Fox Henderson” and one other (Jack and The Mud Queen) utilized his studio and talents (to the point where I thought it was another by him, but in fact was directed by Devon McGregor).  Rather than go through each of his films, I’ll offer a general opinion of his work.  First of all, it’s obvious that he’s a very talented guy and so much of his work is impressive.   Last year, he had a few animated films entered in RIFF 3, and my criticism then was that his films were technically interesting but failed on the story, editing and acting fronts.  This year, all that improved dramatically, and I was very impressed with practically all of his work.  Dan Caseley was very good playing Mr. Death in a couple of very funny silent movies.  One aspect of his work that I don’t care for is in his choice to re-record the dialogue in a controlled environment (just like the big movie-makers do).  While I understand the desire to want to control the sound, it can really adversely affect the performances if the actors aren’t up to the over-dubbing task.  This was most apparent in my least favourite of his films “They That Did Dream”.  The dialogue-audio re-dubbing was very intrusive to the enjoyment of the film.  But, since I didn’t like the story at all anyway, I doubt that better audio would have helped much.
I was very much impressed with the look of Jack and The Mud Queen, and the acting of the lead actor was good, but, like other films presented, this story needed to move along a lot more quickly.  Once again, plodding direction gets in the way.
Onto the non-Fox Henderson films of Reel Shorts 2:
Daniel Arsenault’s “Music Has Family Roots” was a trifling bit of music video.  Basically a single-camera, one shot thing showing two live musical performances of Michael and Robert Pendergast.  Apart from a slightly interesting projection effect, there wasn’t much of interest in this, as a film.  The music performances were good, though.
“This and That” by Richie Mitchell was a film that I ended up not “getting”.   I think it was about a guy who desired to be a gay thief, but wasn’t because of a priest in a car who followed him around.  In one reality he has a companion who may or may not be his lover, and they steal some money from a store owner.  In another reality, he is alone, with no companion, and rather than steal from, is given an envelope by, the store owner.  He then gives the envelope to the priest.  When he sees his alternate-universe companion crossing the street, he gasps, but the priest shakes his head “no”.  ???  There are also some shots of a woman walking down the street.  She has been shopping.  I didn’t like this one very much.
And the other non-Fox film was my very own, Christmas Lights.  This film, of course, is brilliant, and above criticism.  Seriously, though, I am very proud of this film and think it’s a pretty good piece of work.  It’s a tight, compact, funny piece of tragic-comedy.   The audience seemed to like it quite a bit.
I do think (not really), however, that a conspiracy was hatched to confuse the audience (perhaps in an attempt to keep me from any chance of winning “viewer’s choice”?).  First of all, on the website, my film was shown as being directed by Jason Rogerson.  That was later corrected.  Then, on the Viewer’s Choice slips of paper that each audience member was given, Driving Lights was shown as being directed by Rob MacLean.  And, the title on the actual film is “Christmas Lights” not Driving Lights, but I think that one was an honest mistake.  All the rest, though, is an obvious attempt to confuse the audience.

Of the second round of Reel Shorts, I voted Christmas Lights as my “viewer’s choice”.  If it wasn’t in the running, then my vote would have gone to Fox Henderson’s “The Last Days of Death: After Life”.  It was a very funny piece of comedy and my only criticisms of it are that it is too long and the joke doesn’t go anywhere.  Each scene is merely a different version of the same joke.  It is only too long because it’s one-joke retold again and again.  And again.  I wanted each scene to build on the previous scenes in some way, but they didn’t.  As a result, the joke didn’t have a conclusion.  It just ended.

In the past, I’ve railed against the Reel Island Film Festival for showing films that I didn’t think were good enough to be shown.  I complained that RIFF’s eyes were bigger than its stomach.  Meaning that the festival was too big for the amount and quality of films it screened.  This year’s event, due to a lack of funding, was very much paired down compared to previous RIFF festivals.  Whereas in the past, they might have tried to have two evenings of shorts screenings and would have had to “water down” the overall quality in order to fill up all the slots, this year’s festival, I think, benefitted by the single night (of shorts).  The result was an evening with a pretty solid lineup of shorts.  An impressive variety of films.
I do think they need to be careful, though, with the potential problem that the RIFF could turn into the Fox Henderson Film Festival.  Nothing against Fox, and his work is definitely worthy of being shown, but ideally, I would have liked to have seen a couple less entries from Fox and a couple more entries from other people.

Mythical Super Hero Anne – Chapter 5 (of 5)

And now the conclusion of Episode 21 of The Adventures of Mythical Super Hero Anne:

5.

            Mythical
Super Hero Anne, now back in her Toshomiko costume, kneeled beside her fallen
adopted parents, and best friend. 
“Oh, my friend, Diannakiro,” she said, with tears in her
eyes.  “My adopted father,
Matthewsan.  And my adopted
father-sister, Malirra.  How I grieve for
the loss of you all!”  But what was
this?  Miracle of miracles!  They were reviving!  All of them, alive!  “Oh, thank heavens!  You’re all safe.”

            Matthewsan
rose to his feet, and helped Malirra up as Toshomiko helped Diannakiro
rise.  “What happened to us?”
asked Matthewsan.

            “My
mind is all out of shape,” said Diannakiro, rubbing her bum where
Gilzilla’s rock had hit her.

            “My
friends,” said Toshomiko, “Gilzilla knocked you unconscious.”

            Matthewsan
gasped.  “Gilzilla was here?!  Are you okay, Toshomiko?”

            “Yes,
I am fine, thank you to you.”

            Matthewsan
looked about the apartment, surveying all the damage the great battle had
caused. “Mythical Super Hero Anne, the mythical super hero girl, must have
come and destroyed Gilzilla before he had the chance to finish us off
properly.”

            Malirra
rubbed her head and said, “Malirra say, ‘Now we suffer from amnesia, and
cannot remember a thing about the ordeal.”

            “Malirra
is wise and correct,” said Toshomiko, going to her to comfort the wise old
woman.  “The three of you do have
amnesia.  Yes, Mythical Super Hero Anne
was here, and she did ward off Gilzilla in a great fight.”  All three of Mythical Super Hero Anne’s human
friends gasped as they tried to imagine what surely was the immensity of the
battle.  “But he is not dead,”
continued Toshomiko.  Further gasps, this
time of fear and dismay.  “While you
were unconscious, Mythical Super Hero Anne searched for him, but I fear she did
not catch him, as he went back to the sea. 
She hopes to catch him soon.”

            “Ahhh,”
said Matthewsan, nodding his head, “that is why she did not stick around
to check on our injuries.”  He
picked up some paper mache that used to be part of the wall between the living
square and kitchen square, and studied it, trying to figure out the role it
played in the fight.  “I only wish
that I could have seen the battle, or at least could have met Mythical Super
Hero Anne.”

            “That
is true,” said Diannakiro.  “I,
too, wish that I could one day meet the mythical super hero, known as Mythical
Super Hero Anne.” 
Toshomiko/Mythical Super Hero Anne looked at Diannakiro, waiting for the
knowing wink that, before the battle, would have accompanied such a
remark.  But none came.  It
seems they all really do have amnesia.

            “Yes,”
said Toshomiko.  “I hope I can see
her one day, myself.  But I as well, was
knocked into a state of dizziness, and so her identity must remain a
mystery.”  Toshomiko looked around
the room at her injured loved ones. 
“But now we are all tired and injured and we must rest.  Come, Malirra, we must go to bed.”

            “Malirra
say, ‘Bed is the place for sleep and fun. 
Fun for two, and sleep for one.”

            Everybody
laughed at Malirra’s joke. 
Toshomiko/Mythical Super Hero Anne breathed a sigh of relief that
everyone seemed to be in good spirits after their ordeal.  She breathed another sigh of relief that now
no one knew her true identity, which would help her protect them in the
inevitable future battles she would have with Gilzilla.  And this time she would try extra hard to
keep her secret.

            “We
may be injured and have amnesia, Toshomiko,” said Diannakiro, still giggling.  “But at least your adopted father-sister
is still wise and witty.”

            “She
is wise and witty,” agreed Toshomiko, “but we are all more
tired.”

            “Malirra
say, ‘We are all tired and injured, but not so tired and injured that we will
not work tomorrow.”

            Everyone
nodded.

            Toshomiko
looked at everybody, happy that they were all safe.  “And Mythical Super Hero Anne will work
forever!”

            Everybody
had another laugh and then went to bed, Matthewsan, Malirra and Diannakiro
resting themselves for tomorrow’s workday, Toshomiko/Mythical Super Hero Anne
resting herself for tomorrow’s workday, and for future adventures.

 

The End

 

[Join Mythical Super Hero Anne and all
the gang next month for another exciting chapter, Part 22,  “Gee, I’m Glad I’m No One Else But
Mythical Super Hero Anne”.  ed.
note.]

T-Dot Doesn’t Want Us

We just got word that we won’t be attending that CBC sketch comedy special in Toronto.  The producers picked another group from the Atlantic Provinces.  That’s the bad news.
The good news is that they didn’t pick any of the other groups that performed that night in Halifax.  That would have been hard to take, since I thought we were the best of the bunch.  They picked a group from Newfoundland, a group that sent in a demo tape since they couldn’t make the voyage to Halifax to perform.  That’s too bad, that they got to submit what I assume to be their best material, while the rest of us were judged on what we did on that night.  I wonder if we would have had a better shot if we had just sent them a DVD of our material?  Probably not.
Anyway, ahead we go, writing sketches for another summer show here in PEI.

At least Charlottetown audiences love and or hate us.

Sci-Fi With My Little Eye…

Here’s a link to a short essay on The Top Ten Sci-Fi Films That Never Existed.
A pretty accurate assesment of what went wrong, story-wise, with some of the biggest Sci-Fi movies, what should have been done instead, and/or what movies should have been made but haven’t and won’t be.
Usually I stick my nose up at people who toss off their opinions of what’s wrong with things because their annoying personalities get in the way of their points, but this guy, David Wong, sticks to the business at hand and offers an exciting alternate universe of what might have been.