Author Archives: Rob MacD

Mow Is Me

All day at work today, it’s been in the back of my mind – the grass at home needs to be cut.  Tonight.  It should have been cut last night, but I had a Sketch22 rehearsal.  A long busy day does not end with work today at 5pm.  Nope, the toil moves from the mental to the physical this evening.

Yes, my son (purely from the economic advantages it affords him) has taken on more and more of the task, but it’s still my least favourite part of home-ownership.

Today, I implore you all, instead of your usual prayers for the orphans, the impoverished, the sick and infrim, pray for me.  Pray for me and my suburban woes.

Everyday I Jump The Shark

I was reading somewhere else on the internets a discussion as to when Elvis Costello jumped the shark.  And it made me ponder that exact same question.  When exactly did he jump the shark for me?

Back in the early 1980’s I was a pretty huge Costello fan.  His first, from 1977, My Aim Is True is one of those almost perfect albums.  Smart sharp vitriolic angry songs, he was kind of the thinking man’s punk.  The next few albums of his never could, and never did, match the quality of his first, though they all had some great songs.  And that was enough to keep him tops of my pops.
I was originally going to say that Punch The Clock was his Shark Jumping album.  Yeah, it had some nice songs, Everyday I Write The Book, Shipbuilding most notably, but it missed on a few cylinders, and it sounded too…soft.  Strings and horns and orchestrations?  From the thinking man’s punk?  Was he done for? 
But how could I say he’d jumped the shark when he still had the albums Blood & Chocolate, King of America, and even Spike (an album I liked but many others didn’t as much)… all really good albums with a lot of great songs?  Surely we had to accomodate him experimenting with the pop songs and sound of Punch The Clock.  I had to give him that allowance.  No, I decided, Punch the Clock did not jump the shark.
Nor do I think he jumped the shark with Mighty Like a Rose.  Yes, it’s a difficult album to like, and the one that forever changed me from a buy-every-Elvis-Costello-Album guy to one who would wait and hear the reviews first.  But still, it was Elvis being Elvis.  Not very good Elvis, but still Elvis.
With the follow-up to that one, though,  The Juliet Letters with the Brodsky Quartet, Elvis was pretty much done for in my mind. An egotistical stunt if ever there was one.
That was his Jump The Shark Album.  Without question.

Harrison Ford’s Own Peter Pan

George Lucas signed off on this.  For that, he can never be forgiven.

The Star Wars Holiday Special (quicktime video)

Featuring:  Chewbacca and his family; a cooking demonstration; Bea Arthur singing; Carrie Fisher singing; and other unspeakables.  I have my Peter Pan ignominy, Harrison Ford has this.

Tar Zan Rub Ber Band

The folks over at Screenhead called this video "possibly the greatest thing we’ve ever seen."  That statement, of course, is one which begs to be brought down.
However, watching it, I may just have to agree.  It is possibly the greatest thing I’ve ever seen.

Same Or Different Song?

I was walking up town at lunch today, listening to music in my own little world. I passed another person who was likewise listening to music.  I wondered what were the chances that we’d be listening to the same song.
Then I thought of this:  If I had to walk the earth, listening to music, and I had to stop each person I met who was also listening to music, and ask them what they were listening to… If I had to do that until I found somebody who was listening to the same song at the same time I was…(follow that so far?)  would I have a greater chance of success if I continually listened to the same song, over and over, until I found somebody who was also listening to that same song… or would it be better for me to randomly listen to songs, hoping to meet somebody who also randomly was listening to the same song at the same time?

I need to know.

The Okie Music Hall Of Fame

Last night, Vonzell got the boot.  Finally.
Even though there are two remaining American Idol contestants, there really is only one viable choice.
Watching the "Idol goes back to their hometown" video segments and Carrie went back, got the key to the city, and also received induction into the Oklahoma  (I just spelled it Oklahomo, then changed it – I wonder how many soft Okie boys have been called an Oklahomo?) Music Hall of Fame.
I immediately thought to myself "if I was a member of the Oklahoma Music Hall of Fame, I’d be pretty sad to suddenly have my status decline in such a dramatic way by the inclusion of such a robotic ‘of the moment’ barely-talent like Carrie Underwood.  Kind of like when Lassie got a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.  It instantly devalued all significance such a gesture meant to worthwhile people who received it before and after.

Bo will win.  Bo must win.  And I don’t really like his music.  It’s just that Carrie is such a blip of talent, it’d be sad if she won.  Her lack of talent (yes, she can sing, but she can’t – you know – sing.  No soul) doesn’t deserve it.

The Answer My Friends Is Belinda Wins

Okay, so it’s supposed to be Blowin’ in the Wind.  I expect I’d have needed to explain that title…unless you say it fast out loud, and in just the right way.

So, Belinda Stronach walks across. Not quite the same impact as hearing that Gretzky went to the Kings from Edmonton, but I admit, I’m glad of this if it means no spring or summer election, as it most likely will.  I like Belinda.  Really the main thing I had against her was that she was on the Conservative side.  As for who I’d prefer:  Martin or Harper as leader?  What’s that saying:  It’s better to side with the devil you know than with Stephen Harper.

Hey, lookit me!  I’m talking politics.  I’m a big boy now!  Note, though, that I put this in the category "Games".

Not Even Worth A Clever Title

Listen.  I’m as sick as you are with these interminable reality show recaps of mine.  But I have to comment on this past season of Survivor.
It was, without question, the most I’ve ever enjoyed a Survivor series. A bunch of smart players who knew how to play the game, knew the parameters within which their relationships were based.  It made for some great viewing.
Some of my highlights:
I so immediately hated Wanda the crazy singing crazy woman.  I was so relieved when she didn’t get picked to play.
I really enjoyed the week-by-week-by-weak dismantling of the Ulong tribe.  It was fantastic the way that Stephanie sort of became the symbol for the Downtrodden (in a reality TV kind of way, I’m not talkin’ starvin’ Africans here) and it became almost impossible not to root for her.  Wouldn’t it have been fantastic if she did make it all the way to final two?  She sure is purty.
I was saddened when Ashlee was voted out.  I enjoyed looking at her bulging breasts.
I didn’t like James the redneck.
Even though he seems like something of a childish snobby self-centered, I was moved by Coby’s moment when he talked about his childhood.  Still, I didn’t quite understand what his problem with Tom was?  He seemed to fabricate the idea that Tom was constantly lying and manipulating people and wouldn’t budge from it.  From what I saw, Tom played perhaps the purest game ever, in terms of playing straight up and honestly.
Ian was my favourite player.  I was hoping he’d win.  What a crazy last three or four days for him.  A couple of minor slip ups in what he says and it implodes on him.  The emotional argument he had with Katie was fantastic, even though it made no sense, logically.  it was simple emotion-vomit.  His decision to give up the chance at final two:  I think I understand it, what with respect himself and all, but man…???
Katie made it to final two by riding the coat-tails of two strong players.  That’s fine.  But what lost her the million dollars was her inability to play the other aspects of the game.  She could have still rode the coat-tails but actually contributed more to the community.  That’s where she failed.
Tom deserved to win, hands down.  He totally dominated in practically every way, outplaying everyone.  He was smart, outwitting all without being in their faces about it…and he outlasted.

So, Survivor will never be as good again as this previous season has been.  I’ll have to admit that and never forget when I watch the next bunch of nuts in Guatamala.

Amazing Race also concluded last week.  It too was a great season, thanks almost entirely to Rob and Amber.  They were the season’s heroes, villains and scapegoats all wrapped into one package.  They never forgot what I consider the two most important rules (that I would try and follow if I was playing): never forget that this is a game and that means doing whatever necessary within the bounds of the game to get ahead, and two: respect your partner.
The final episode was very good, glad that Uchenna and Joyce won, but am pretty skeptical about that plane thing at the end.  If you don’t know, I won’t bother explaining it, because, you know… who really cares anyway?

I hate The Aprrentice but I watch it.  I hate American Idol but I watch it.  I watch because I hate.  They both wrap up fairly soon, but I’ll not bother with recaps on those shows.  There, that’ll show them how much I hate them.

Tammys And Jum

Today, we shot some video for our upcoming season of Sketch22.
We started out bright and early (for a Saturday) at 9am at Timothy’s.  After caffeination and chit chat, we headed to the CARI complex.  It was my first time in the building.  From the brief glimpse I got, it’s a pretty nice facility. Today was also convocation for UPEI students, and that was also taking place at CARI, so the place was buzzin’.  We were shooting a video that required three of us to dress in drag, and we shot it in one of the two rinks, while watching girls hockey.  It was pretty noisy in the rink, and the rink itself really swallowed up the sound, so I’m hoping the sound will, well, sound okay.
I was impressed with the level of hockey we saw too.  I guess a tournament was on, or something, but some of those girls can really play hockey.

After shooting that bit of silliness, we went to the Farmers Market for some lunch (I had a schawarma) then it was to the CBC to shoot another video that’s part of a live sketch.  It was a pretty simple setup and Andrew and Dennis, the actors for that video, gave it their all.  They had me biting my tongue quite a bit, trying not to laugh.  I hope that video turns out to be nearly as funny to others as it seemed to me.
Overall, the summer show is starting to come together nicely, I think.  It’s kind of hard to gauge now, because some of the sketches that we have, we’ve been looking at, tweaking and fretting over for a couple of months now and the humour has long been drained out of them for us.  We have to keep remembering our first time hearing those sketches and trust they are as funny now as they seemed when we first heard them.

Behind the scenes at Sketch22, we’ve been fortunate to have the mighty Ghislaine O’Hanley come on board as our stage manager for the summer.  Ghislaine is tops in my book, and I look forward to what she’ll bring to the show.

You can keep up to date with the latest Sketch22 goings-on at the Sketch 22 Online Glamour Site.

The Anti-Courtesy Call

A couple of weeks ago, the phone rang, during our dinner, I answered and it was some customer service representative from one of our banks or credit cards.  He explained this is a customer service call, and asked to speak to my wife (since, I assume, the credit card from that bank happens to be in her name).  I told him she wasn’t home, which was true, and would he like to speak to me, since we share the bank account and the credit card.
He said no, he has to speak to Karyn.
You *have to* speak to her?  (I was put off by the urgency and insistence in his voice.)
"Yes."
Well, is it something important, that you *have to* speak to her?
"No, nothing like that.  It’s simply a customer courtesy call."
A courtesy call in which you *have to* speak to my wife?
"That’s right."
Well, she’s not home.
"Is there a better time to reach her?"
No.
"Maybe tomorrow at the same time?"
I don’t know when she’ll be home, specifically.  I mean you can try, but I’ll not guarantee anything.  Okay, bye.
"Thank you."

That bugged me.  I wanted to grill him on the definition of ‘courtesy’ and how I didn’t think cold-calls like this were much of a courtesy to their clients.  Oh well.

Tonight, the phone rings.  Long distance.  Oh good, I think.  I answer, and it’s a pleasant, professional sounding woman on the other end.
"May I speak to Karyn, please."
Karyn’s not home right now.  Which, again, was true.
"Is there another time that would be more convenient to speak to her?"
No.  Is there something I can help you with?  I’m her husband and we share the account.
"No thank you. I really must speak with Karyn.  It’s just a courtesy call from {blank} bank to see if there’s anything we can do for her."
I see.  This is the third time (I lied, it was the second only, but three sounds like more trouble) I’ve received this call for her.  Doesn’t really seem like much of a courtesy to keep bothering your customers like this.
"Maybe I could just call back another time and try to get her again."
Yeah, no.  You’ll probably just get me again. It’s not very courteous to keep calling us.  Is there any way you can take her off this call list?
"Uhhhh…"
Because it’s not really a courtesy to be receiving these phone calls from you. In fact, it’s the opposite of courtesy.  It’s a nuisance.  Can you remove her name so she doesn’t get called again?"
"Yes.  Yes, I can do that."
Thank you.
"Okay. Bye."